I Think I’m a Bear!

Good day to all from my Skycastle in Germany where the sun is already peeking out and I look forward to teaching my Friday art class. It’s a delightful class of German teenager’s who speak quite a bit of English and we have such a grand time creating art an trying to understand each other. Last class they taught me how to, with German etiquette, request that the class quiet down. “Fuel element quiet, bitte!” What a giggle we had over my pronunciation.

Last night my husband and I had such an amazing evening, as usual I made the welcome home meal, however I made it all a little more special. Instead of eating at our little bistro table I set the dining table with candles, wine and proper meal tools. We opted out of routine and had a beautiful conversation on the “The Phenomenon of Attraction” and its explanation of who God is and before we knew it, it was 11:00, an hour after our bedtime. I learned so much more about my husband, even after eight years of wedded bliss I am still learning more. I have a very different view of who God is and most of it I cannot really explain how I know. I go into meditation, contemplate/envision how infinite the universe is and things come to me. I plan to write an article, probably a series, on my explanation or understanding of the almighty. One of the topics we discussed was on the light and the dark, which by the way is most often thought of as good and bad, right and wrong, but this is not how it is.

It’s the Yin and the Yang; it is used to describe how polar or seemingly contrary forces are interconnected and interdependent in the natural world, and how they give rise to each other in turn; neither being better, right or good or worse, wrong or evil. In our conversation I suddenly told Jerome, “I think I’m a bear” He giggled and waited for the clarity, he knew was on its way, and just said, “Oh yea”

I then talked about how, all winter, I hunker down and hibernate. I hold up in my Skycastle, waiting, in the dark staying warm, for the storm to pass. I eat more (gaining a few pounds against the cold), I am less active and I see fewer people. I go inside and it’s the time of the ebb. Life is ebb and flow, light and dark, winter and summer, the Yin and Yang. I noticed that, like so many times I had once again labeled my dark, winter, my ebb as bad or more accurately; unproductive. I spoke of, to Jerome, that I felt like I had wasted much time this winter. I was just a bear.

Later upon analyzing my dark time I realized the natural complimentary polar of life. You must experience the Yin the dark time. The dark time is the time for the practice of introspection to look inside and examine one’s self. It is the time of rest, the ebb, Yin or dark, which one must experience in order that they meet the Yang or flow, the light with more clarity.

The time of ebb is no less important than the time of flow. Ebb is a productive time of introspection, rest and re-centering. It is a time of putting to rest the former or no longer valid ideas. It is a time for reconsidering your life and what is to be discarded for more understanding. Ebb is the time of withdrawal in order that you might reassess, with new information, your position and knowledge. Every day we reform our understanding and come to new conclusion or new truth. Yesterday’s truth was truth for yesterday. Today’s truth is now truth today; and it shall forever be so.

In the dark, winter, we withdraw and contemplate analyze and dream; and sometimes grieve. The dark times in our life are very important. It’s important not to discount our dark time for it is the time of much needed withdrawal from the active world.

In the dark we grieve a loss, we go inside for our understanding, our final analyses and then we emerge into the light, the spring, with a greater understanding, renewed, reborn, and re-centered and clarity is once again ours.

Aw, the light, the Yang, the flow, and the clarity what a marvelous and divine feeling. Certainly the light would not feel so good had we not experienced the dark. The light is our gift for having been in the dark.

In this cold and dark winter I waited for the light to come with much urgent anticipation and resistance and distaste for the dark. And I should not have. My dark time gave me time for contemplation, without outside influence, that brought me to clearer self understanding. I also forget just how productive I had actually been, in the dark, and my husband reminds me. In my hibernation, I had painted just about every wall in my house, painted or created several pieces of art for the walls, realized my Tremble and launched my uvisualeyes business in which I produced eight video’s (in the interim learned the computer programs photoshop and sony vegas) unfortunately learned about computer viruses, yuk, journaled and read a lot and came to a new understanding of self. Phew, that was a lot. Doesn’t sound like I rested much, I think it was the actions of being stir crazy in the dark confines of my cave. Non-the-less, I contemplated a lot. I contemplate a lot anyway.

Now I have emerged into the light into the flow. Spring is here and my body tingles with excitement and I open like a rose. My petals are new, supple, colorful, and brilliant. My arms wide open, extended to the sky, to the promise of a new day. I am, once again, blooming. My hibernation over, the dark passed into light and in the brilliance of the sunrise, I rejoice. I am flowing, my body is moving and I feel the stimulation/energy of the renewal of all life.

I am a river now; flowing, creating, expanding, emerging, evolving, beaming and blooming. I have many plans for the warm seasons. I shall be more than I have been before. I am more confident, clear and open to the opportunities sure to come my way.

I go out to meet the expanding world, the light and the beauty. I feel the joy of absorbing the resplendent life renewed.

My playground, is once again, lit by the radiance of a new day, and I shall fly, on my bike, through the warm air.

I thank the dark and embrace the light.

I’m glad I was a bear.

Enjoy, embrace and celebrate the light.

Be Well

Love Michelle