That being said, today we will tour through living well, loving much and laughing often. Truly if you are loving much and laughing often you are living well.
What does living well mean? It might seem somewhat evasive and it is of course completely subjective. The meaning of living well certainly varies from person to person. We all want love, joy, abundance and health, but the specifics are personal. I want abundance in all aspects of my life. I want abundant love, joy, health and means. How that looks to each individual shall vary.
Awww to live well, what a delightful desire. To live well is to experience a life full of possibilities, to see our world as our playground, an unending glorious banquet of choices, and a universe of plenty for all and to appreciate and enjoy it all.
There was a day that I did not see life this way. I saw life as an obstacle course in which I worked diligently to figure out how best to navigate through, with as little pain as possible. This is called survival.
Live Well, Love Much, Laugh Often,
The American Psychologist Abraham Maslow, in 1943, proposed the theory on what motivates the human to anything. It’s called Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. Looking at the pyramid of needs you can see that it all begins at the bottom of the pyramid with meeting our basic survival needs, then works up to basically living in self-actualization. I agree with most of his theory however, I disagree with acceptance of facts, as he sees facts. Because really what Maslow is saying there is that we are suppose to come to accept reality as decided by the masses. Now if he were speaking of accepting the fact that we manifest our own reality, then I agreed; lest I digress.
Many people are hung up in survival/physiological and Safety, dabbling in Love/belonging. If you have ever questioned the concept that we must manifest great abundance, that we are suppose too, then take a look at Maslow’s chart and notice that you cannot progress up if you have not secured your financial life. If you are hung up in survival then all you do is survive, instead of thrive.
Living well means, seizing every moment of possibility. Living in the moment, the now, appreciating every second and refusing to allow yourself to lament over the past or future. It means noticing all the most glorious and divine elements of our world. You could stand on a street corner, give attention and focus to the poor begging, in guilt, or you could turn around and notice the lovers, caring not of anything else, kissing and appreciate this.
You could stand in your kitchen and notice, in disgust, the mess your children are making or notice and appreciate the joy on their faces for having left a mess around their grand creations.
You could stand in your yard and notice, in frustration, that your partner has not mowed the lawn yet or you could notice the fulfillment on your partner’s face for having focused on their Tremble instead.
Living well means seizing every opportunity to grow, learn, appreciate, enjoy and absorb the divine all around. It means seeing Monday morning; I do, as a new start, an opportunity to start over again with new possibilities. Yes I love Monday’s. I love Monday’s because it feels like opportunity to start over.
Living well means; greeting everything and everyone with such buoyant joy and appreciation, that your attitude is infectious. Greeting your partner, child or friend, every time, as if you had not seen them in ages, like your dog does every time you return home; his tail is wagging in such delight that you feel important and fully loved and appreciated.
No matter how busy I am in my day I stop at 4:00 and prepare for my husband’s arrival from work. Sometimes I lament for a short while because I have made my work, in my mind, critical; which it never should be. But then I quickly remind myself that it isn’t critical. I clean the kitchen, prepare a beautiful meal, put on soothing music (in the winter I light candles) make sure that I look like I haven’t been knee deep in work all day and I set a delightful table. When my husband arrives I run to him, wagging my tail, in complete elation of seeing his beautiful face, like I haven’t just seen him eight hours earlier. I kiss him, hug him, take his lunch bag and anything he is holding and ask of his day. I am showing utter joy and appreciation for him. I always thank him for returning home. At first my husband was a little bewildered at my appreciation for his return. After all he said, “I live here and where else would I go?” But he does have a choice. He now appreciates that I appreciate that he makes a choice to return and with excitement and anticipation he returns home; and often brings me flowers.
We should greet everything and everybody this way.
This is loving much, because in living well, we love much.
Love everything and everybody. Love yourself, who you are, what you bring to this world and how you bring it. Love that you love. Love your love.
I have an acronym for Love
V ivaciously and
In our appreciation and love for others we lift them, with vivacious joy and elevate them to their divinity. This goes for yourself as well.
Laughing often is important. It stimulates your cells, your body, increases endorphins which make you feel good, releases stress and makes a path for great manifestations. Before I met my husband, at the closing of raising my three children, I was a quit serious woman. I credited this seriousness to this condition; I felt I must maintain seriousness to assure that my children be guided well, were safe and understood the seriousness of life. Yuk! Thank Source I do not think this way any longer.
Upon meeting Jerome I was resistant, as well as intrigued, at his boyish unserious and unrestrained spirit of play. He is by all definitions a Jester. In the beginning I was annoyed that he so often was not serious, that he saw life as a playground and sometimes, truly, he was quit inappropriate. It was my issue not his. But over time, without small children just one big one, I loosened up. I began to let go of my seriousness, let go of my idea that if one is not serious one might be judged wrongly. I let go of thinking I could only accomplish my goals through serious, intense force and began enjoying the journey.
I began laughing more and joyously participating in Jerome’s playground. I remember the exact moment that I turned around. I had prepared a meal, along with the evening’s agenda, as it must go and waited seriously for my actor, Jerome, to come home and play his part as directed.
When he arrived I was stirring my brewing pots. He raced into the door and said, “BBBBaaaaabbbbby!” then raced to the stereo put on a piece of music, a love song he had stumbled upon, and grabbed me up close to slow dance to the love song; with an emotional tear in his eye and a intention to sit in the Jacuzzi, with me, sipping margaritas for the rest of the night and make love. Much to his dismay I seriously informed him of my agenda. He ignored my idea and continued to sway me to the music. Suddenly, to myself, I said, ‘what are you doing? This is an experience you have desired all your life. A man who, in love for you, wants to dance with you, love you and charm his way into your pants. And all you can think of is your serious agenda”
I then let the dinner dry up and let myself be swooned.
Then as we rolled around, under the covers, tickling, laughing and kissing the words to a song popped into my head an Elton John song;..Living like lovers, laughing like children, rolling like thunder under the covers.. .’ and I giggled aloud.
Laughing is an elixir a stimulation of the soul. It’s time to let go of being serious and laugh. Laugh until you cry, laugh until you can’t breathe, laugh until you pee your pants and laugh until you remember that laughing is life and joy. Laugh at yourself, your seriousness, your agenda, and your humanness.
I will end today’s article with a short story, one of many, which I wrote, many years back, about a transaction between myself and my oldest daughter.
It was a busy school morning in the Spring. I had been busy constantly through winter. Christmas exhausted me with all the baking and sewing. The Super Mom I was in those days did that to me. I was making lunches at a frantic pace. Kesha was yelling, "I can't find my socks. I was yelling, "There in your top drawer." Finally I had to go in her room and find them for her, since children alway's look for things in the sky and I never ever keep socks in the sky. Rustin was an infant and crying as such. I needed to feed him, but I was busy finding socks and making sandwiches.
Tina had been getting ready for her junior high day. She had come into the kitchen, several times, for assistance in her preparation. Since sh is the oldest I let her worry about herself as mothers quite often unfairly do. The rush against the school time clock was ticking. Kesha was finally dressed and at the table scarfing down her super sugar something or others. As I raced around the kitchen Kesha rattled on about third grade activities. I listened as best I could through the crying baby and Tina's, frustrated with her hair, teenage brush throwing the bathroom. I ran to get the baby and put him where I could see and talk to him. I continued making lunches and taking for granted that my oldest would remain tolerant as usual.
I dipped my knife into the mustard and turned to her Tina stomping into the kitchen. She began to announce her frustration, "Mom" she blurted, "This is all so unfair, you pay more attention to Kesha and Rustin" My own frustration mounted higher. Crying she continued, "You haven't been paying any attention to me" Waving her fist she said, "You don't spend time with me anymore." Well you know what happens to most of us when we hear those words; always, anymore, and never from a loved one. We become totally defensive. Soon I became, "MOTHER INADEQUATE" I stood in front of Tina, still holding the butter knife of mustard. Tina went on crying in her defense, "You never spend one minute with me." I said, "I do too. I have a million things to do around here." Tears welled in my eyes. I pointed at Tina with my knife, "I need help around here, maybe if you helped more I would have more time to spend with you" (Did I really say that, Yuk) Tina sobbed, "I help"
Crying, raising my knife in the air I said,"I spend a lot of with you" and I thrust my knife forward gesturing. The mustard came flying off the knife at my crying teenager and splat! The mustard landed on the front of her light blue shirt. Sobbing we both stopped, looked at the mustard, then at each other. I cried, "Oh sunshine I'm sorry" We then hugged and squeezed the mustard everywhere. We separated to see the mustard on ourselves, and with teary hysterical laughter, and at what had become the love between us.
Live Well, Love Much, Laugh Often